One of the hardest part of my retirement is getting dressed in the morning. First world problems I know… Stick with me here, before I retired I would get up each day and realize I had 130 sets of eyes staring at me all day. When you are under that kind of pressure you really think about your choices and what reaction they will elicit.

A lot of those 130 sets of eyes don’t care what you have on or even realize you are wearing clothing but a portion of them have no filter and think you have no feelings; so they feel free to say whatever they think about the outfit of the day. One of my favorite questions regarding what I had on was, “Miss Halasz do you think that top matches those pants?” I did until about 30 seconds ago and clearly I was wrong. Or, there is always the, “there is no right answer to this question” statement, “Do you own a mirror?” One day I had a new striped shirt on and a student said in a huff, “Do NOT wear that shirt again it makes me dizzy it’s so test patterney!” And the final reaction was repeated often this last year, a hand gesture and screaming, the student in question would look at me and wave his hand from my head to my toes and scream, “Oh No, No, No!”

On the flip side of that coin is when they like what you are wearing. I once had a kid tell me, and I quote here, “Miss Halasz, in that outfit, you are working it like a cross-dresser on a Thursday night!” What the hell does that even mean???? One youngster said, “No other teacher your age would wear something that on fleek!” First, how old do they think I am and second if a 13 year-old thinks this is a good look perhaps it’s not age appropriate for this boomer?

These days I dress in whatever I want. You would think this would be one of the great rewards of being retired. Everyday is jean day, no snarky comments regarding my striped shirt choice and full on comfort 24/7. Actually it has created an entirely new level of stress in my life. What if I put on an outfit that looks horrible? Will any of my friends have the nerve to tell me I look like shit? Or, do I really need the sparkly tennis shoes, do they fit into the real world of adulting? When I worked, my excuse for buying something a bit over the top was always, the kids will think its a riot. Now that I have no students to care perhaps my love of the sparkly shoe is just bad taste coming through…

And Finally, post working there is an entire section of the closet I don’t know what to do with. Can I really wear my “Field School Gear” in public without being a teacher? I mean, a Mighty Field Mice t-shirt on a school spirit Friday fits in just fine, but in the real world will I look like a dork. And how about all those Mighty Mice broach and earring sets, will they still represent school spirit or have I just slipped into the creepy neighbor category with a mouse fetish??? And don’t even get me started on the number of tie-dyed Field Volleyball shirts I own… What do I do with all of these treasures and will any of them fit into my new job as coffee shop denizen?

This retirement gig is good but don’t let anyone tell you it doesn’t have its stresses. Sure these are first world problems but problems none the less. Maybe a nice mouse broach on this Might Mouse hoodie will cheer me up!