Dear Miss Chambliss

  • Miss Chambliss
  • C/O Muessel School
  • 1021 Blaine Ave.
  • South Bend, IN 46616

Dear Miss Chambliss,

I would like to apologize for the amount of time it has taken me to get this letter to you. As you may recall I was in your sewing class in 1973. If that doesn’t ring a bell perhaps reminding you of my most regrettable choices while under your tutelage will.

It was a fall day like any other and your students were sewing their denim jumpers with the buttons on the shoulder straps. As you might recall my talented sister, Julia, sewed an entire trousseau while in your class, but I was having trouble with the jumper. I decided to stay in for recess to get some extra time logged in on my project because after all, I had a family reputation to uphold.

The trouble started when the other girls came inside from recess. I had established myself at the ‘New’ Singer sewing machine. (“Choose the right tools for the job”, my older and more talented sister would say.) One of my classmates, who shall remain nameless, did not like the fact that I had chosen the best spot, evidently it was her turn to use that station. Well, neither one of us were known for our way with words so as sometimes happens in middle school a bit of a scuffle broke out. You came in from hall duty just as the table was tipped over and a barrage of colored pencils took to the air. Moreover the unnamed girl and I were using some inappropriate language and throwing punches.

Like all great middle school teachers you were able to stop the fight in 30 seconds and sent us to the principal. He was not happy, and proceeded to give us a LONG suspension- 7 days, and an even longer lecture about school appropriate vocabulary! I’ll never forgot the essence of his message; until someone invents rap music in like another 10 years, adjectives like the ones you two hoodlums shouted shall not be used in polite society.

I don’t remember much about the 7 day suspension but I did finish that jumper. When I handed it in you were still a bit mad. The only part of the project you commented on was the amazing job I had done on the buttons. That praise amounted to the participation award of sewing class.

I’m sending you this note after all this time for two reasons. First, I would like to say I am truly sorry for disturbing your teaching time. Furthermore, my choice of language that day was abhorable. If it is any consolation I just retired from teaching, where I spent 30 years in a middle school classroom, I think I got my just desserts. Secondly, I would like to say THANK YOU. Today I used my super power, button sewing, to fix my boyfriends pants and thanks to you he thinks I am a domestic goddess!

Yours truly,

Mary Catherine Halasz

aka, Potty Mouth 🙂

Tech Support

I wanted to give a quick shout out to my pal Seth. On Sunday Seth helped me learn a few new things that will make blogging easier and make my pages look more professional. He actually taught me a line of “Code”, holy hell I feel so 2019!!!

Just a word about Seth. I believe he could teach me anything. And in truth he has. Years ago someone at the National Science Foundation, NSF, had the great idea that if you trained teachers better, with regards to Math, student test scores would rise. It does make sense, the deeper ones knowledge is on a topic the more resources they have at their disposal to help others learn said subject. I had the extreme good fortune to get this NSF training with a wonderful group of people one of whom was Seth.

I’m not going to lie, my Math knowledge stalled out in 7th grade in Mr. Modelyn’s class where I earned an “F” because I couldn’t do my math facts quickly enough. (I’m sorry but that cute boy in the next row was so distracting I had no time to learn those math facts. Darn you Tom Csenar!) Additionally my self-esteem took a hit in college where I failed Math For Elementary Teachers One. (That may or may not have been lack of knowledge, rather a plethora of partying and not going to class!) Even with all this baggage Seth “cheered” me onto success in the NSF program. When I say “cheered” I mean patiently and painstakingly worked with me until I actually understood all the concepts. He never gave up on me, even during my most hopeless and tearful begging fits.

Additionally, I had the pleasure of teaching with Seth. His educational philosophy and view of what is best for children helped me become a better teacher. He would ask me just the right questions or challenge a belief I had which in turn made me think more deeply about my relationships with children and my own educational philosophy. All with the patience of a saint. 🙂 (He will hate that line!)

I try to end these blog posts with some sort of bottom line or take away, so here are two. One, get one of those friends who challenges your thinking, someone who doesn’t let you give up. And two, some of us may be old but it doesn’t mean we can’t learn some new thing, such as a line of code that will center the heading for the photos on your blog! This was a very long post to say THANKS Seth, love you.

* The names are never changed to protect the innocent, spelled incorrectly, but never changed!

English teacher speaking English.

Last Spring with my retirement looming I decided that maybe what I needed was a retirement adventure. After all, every year for the last 52 (one way or another), when Fall came around I was starting school. And in the coming year, the fall of 2019, I would be starting… nothing. So I did a little research and came up with the perfect solo adventure.

I had heard of a program called Angloville, where native English speakers traveled to other countries to work with adults who wanted to improve their conversational English. Angloville has programs in several European countries but the country that captured my imagination was Hungary. Shortly before WWII my fathers family immigrated to the United States from Hungary; I had always wanted to see “The Old Country” so working with Angloville seemed like a great fit.

My trip to Hungary coincided with the first week of the new school year. I was too excited about my upcoming adventure to miss any of my old routines. I planned to fly to Budapest where I would spend a few days on my own and then meet up with the Angloville group and travel to the Varga Tanya Hotel in the heart of Hungary, near the Kiskunság National Park..

After a few days on my own I joined up with the Angloville volunteers and our fearless leaders Astrid and Kornél . The other volunteer English speakers were from Northern Ireland, Scotland, The US and South Africa. Early on in this adventure I knew I had found my people, funny, talented, kind, open hearted and irreverent, because of course, I am funny, talented, kind, open hearted and irreverent. The Hungarians were a bit more nervous at first, but soon they were open to the experience of living outside of their comfort zone.

During the week each native speaker was assigned one Hungarian to mentor. The mentoring would culminate with a 5 minute presentation, in English. Additionally the native speakers met with other Hungarians in a variety of sessions including one on one discussions and group activities. Each night ended with a good glass of wine and folks just sitting around chatting about life. Language camp, with wine, for adults, how could life get any better!

I was seeking an adventure to begin my retirement and that is just what I got. The Angloville program helped me kick-off this new phase of my life and blessed me with a host of new friends. I’m ready to go boldly into retirement and live my dreams. 🙂

My Ride Or Die Chick

Earlier this month I had the pleasure of traveling to Italy with one of my oldest friends, Linda. (She is not old, the friendship is. 🙂 ) We’ve been busy with life in the last several years, she running a successful doggie daycare and kicking cancers ass and me teaching middle school and launching a teen into the world. We decided we needed some adventure and to celebrate my retirement, so off to Italy we went.

Now the last time the two of us set off for an adventure we ended up in Martha’s Vineyard. We rode scooters, drank too many martinis, and jumped in a car with strangers to make a midnight run for hot doughnuts. I should say right here the drinking and scooter riding were not done together; I’ll let you decide on the drinking and doughnut run! Linda often says, were the kind of friends who could have fun in an empty parking lot and it’s true.

Italy was everything we thought it would be, amazing food, historic sights, great wine, and tons of laughs. We had so much fun on the scooters in Martha’s Vinyard we tried them again in Rome, this time we were passengers not drivers. Zooming through the streets of Rome with Linda yelling, “I’m going to fall of the back of this freeking thing!” made me snort laugh and is a memory I hope never fades.

Even the Vatican provided us with a chuckle. After weeping at the sight of the Pieta by Michelangelo, the dome in the Bacilica, and the Sistene Chapel… the gift shop was a bit of a letdown. That is, until Linda picked up what she thought were salt and pepper shakers and upon closer inspection uttered, “Shit! This is Holy Water!” On top of that when she returned them to the shelf she missed and they went crashing to the floor. Her cursing and bad aim, hit me just right and I burst out laughing. So much for the decorum of the Vatican.

The thing about a long term friendship is you are ALWAYS there for each other. Laughing in Italy or crying at a family tragedy, Linda is my “ride or die chick.” Linda is just what the urban dictionary says, “someone who is down for you no matter what…your hommie.” My life and my adventures are better because of her, I can’t wait to see where we go next.

Weight Tracking App For Kids, What The Actual F*#%?????

I’m a person who has been chubby, zoftig, pleasingly plump, husky, chunky, plus sized, or fat my entire life. Well that isn’t exactly true, I was a premie so technically I was under weight at some point in this life, but I digress. I think I know a thing or two about dieting, after all I was a lifetime member of Weight Watchers when I was in the 6th grade, and in my late 20s I was treated for bulimia. Imagine my horror this week, when I realized that my old pals at WW introduced a new weight tracking app for children between the ages of 8 and 17. WTF!!

This new app is designed to help kids, in WW words, ” make healthier food choices and build healthy habits, day by day” or in my words “make food the most important aspect of your life for EVER. The app divides food into green/good, yellow/caution and red/STOP YOU PIG categories. Teaching young people that food is the enemy or that if you can’t resist those “red foods” you are somehow bad. Can you tell I think this new app is a really terrible idea.

Don’t get me wrong, eating healthy is important, but to what end. Having children as young as 8 focus so intently on their weight is damaging to their self-esteem. I know, I was that kid, and it has taken the better portion of 57 years to be happy with who I am.

I would like to propose a different app for children, it’s called, YOU ARE GREAT JUST THE WAY YOU ARE! Every day you get an uplifting message from cute puppies. Who wouldn’t love that… Teach kids to love the person they are, not who society thinks they should be.

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I’m his mom…:)

Hi I’m the mom of that kid who doesn’t talk very much. I know what you’re thinking, “If that were my kid…” Well guess what, he is not your kid he is mine, and I think he is just fine! As a matter of fact I think he is the most wonderful, handsome, smart, funny and special kid I know. When he has something to say I guarentee he will let you know.

For those of you who are concerned about what the future holds for an introvert, please consider the following introverts, Albert Einstein, Rosa Parks, Bill Gates, Eleanor Roosevelt, JK Rolling, Mahatma Gandi, Barack Obama, Fredric Chopin and Dr. Seuss. Now perhaps my son isn’t the next Albert Einstein but maybe he is. What ever he does or does not become I just want him to be true to himself and always know that he is enough.

Our world could do with a lot less babble and a little more thoughtful reflection.

20 Days Left…

So I have 20 school days left until I retire. I have been an educator for over 30 years. I have been in my current school for the last 27 years. That is a loooooooooong time. I know I should feel some kind of way as the end aproaches but I don’t feel anything. Mostly I feel like I do every day, have I done enough, will I get the work done and who will I piss off today? Added to that will also be the nagging worry that we will run out of tissues or pencils. Yep, the end is near and I am still worried about pencils.

Welcome!

This is not where it all started but this is the place where this part of the adventure begins. I hope to create a space for expression, stories, photos and whatnot. The first person who makes fun of my poor spelling gets punched! Yes, I said it, punched! Livin my dream. xo